Confession

At the moment, I feel like everything is difficult. Life is difficult.
It's still enjoyable...but hard at the same time.

Getting out of bed when you're so very tired (thanks to noisy neighbours), is hard.
Being motivated to do a job you dislike, is hard.
Saying something loving and kind when you feel hurt and angry, is hard.
Getting excited for the future when you're struggling with the now, is hard.

I do have some exciting (very exciting) things going on and coming up. Some amazing opportunities and wonderful blessings. But at the moment I just can't focus on those things. I only seem to be able to see the ditch I feel I'm in. The muddy, dirty, sticky, horrible ditch.

And the worst part? I know it's directly related to the lack of time I've spent with God.

I'd like to say life has been busy, but that would just be an excuse.
Life has been normal, and I have allowed myself to be un-disciplined and slack off.
I've allowed my relationship with God to slide from being the number 1 priority.
And I can see how it has affected every area of my life. My thoughts, my words, my attitude.
The stinky rubbish that has been revealed. The hurts and insecurities that need healing.

So, I'm confessing my apathy and praying for a renewed passion and desire for God.
For the restorative power of His word. For the comforting presence of His spirit.
For the renewal and transformation of my thoughts, my words, my attitude, my heart.
I so need more of God.

Would you pray for me too?

James 5:16
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.

Psalm 40:2
He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.

Its all so quiet...

We've been away on a little summer holiday.

But now we're back and have some lovely photos to share...

The beautiful beach with mirror water

Calling home to make sure everyone's ok

Just part of the view from the caravan!

Free fruit...if you can wait for it to ripen!

Some serious boy time

'Come on...I'm ready to go!'

Lovely flowers

The neighbours

Bubble time!

Trying out the new coat...all ready for autumn and winter...and beyond!

Future

"If you can understand everything in your future then you're not living by faith"

- Simon Guillebaud, great guy who's living out his calling with his family in Burundi and who spoke at church on Sunday and spoke of our amazing call to adventure in Christ.

For we live by faith, not by sight

2 Corinthians 5:7

Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see

Hebrews 11:1

And because posts are nicer with a picture...

Who's afraid of...

...snails?!

I hate them. Them, and their slug counterparts. Urgh!

Sorry God, but I really do not like them at all one little bit. And if you have blessed me with a son who loves them and wants to bring them in the house and keep them...then I will cry...lots!

Knowing my feelings towards snails, you can imagine my shear joy when I found one inside the fridge this morning! AAARRRGGGHHH!!!!!

There are many benefits to growing our own veg and salad on the allotment. Finding snails anywhere in the house is not one of them!

Phil's response to my problem...they are nice with garlic! Not even slightly funny!

After about 15 minutes of deep breathing and preparation I managed to muster the courage to remove the snail and deposit it outside...via a 2nd storey window (sorry snail!)

Now, I think I must have a great day lined up as it cannot possibly get any worse!

Anyone else not enjoy certain parts of 'nature'?

The clouds, the rain and the wardrobe

Ok...Scotland...so it's supposed to be the middle of summer and it feels like we went straight from spring to autumn! We have had some wonderful summer days here and there...but they were punctuated, quite heavily, by lots of rain!

I think most ladies would agree that during the slightly warmer months we'd love to be out about wearing something like this...

Or looking like this...

Or even fashioning an outfit like this...

But instead I feel that I'd be more appropriate going out dressed like this!

And while it may be completely practical...it's just not flattering at all!

Obviously there are some silver linings...like the potential to wear these...

But really, other than fishermen, who wants to spend the majority of the year wearing wellies?!

Although maybe I could try this look?

I would like one day where I don't feel that I need to wear my boots just in case it rains...or regret not wearing my boots when I get caught in a downpour! And having to push a buggy means that I need my hands free so I can't even skip around with a lovely umbrella :(

They say that there's no such thing as bad weather, only inappropriate clothes.

I'm not sure I agree!

Anyone else surviving weather induced wardrobe malfunctions?!

Sandwiches and prayer...

I try to take my lunch when I'm at work. Buying it everyday can start to get expensive.
But if I do need to buy something, there is a lovely sandwich shop which is always my preference.

I like going there because the bread is usually great.

That's right the bread!

Usually when we think of sandwiches its all about the fillings. The combinations of meat, cheese, salad, dressing or other fancy things that get your taste buds going.

We don't always give much thought to the bread. It's kinda functional. Just there to serve a purpose...not really the main point.

But a sandwich wouldn't be a sandwich without the bread and the quality of the bread can make or break the sandwich.

And I think it's like that with prayer...

...ok, so you now think I'm crazy...but just hear me out...

Prayer is an integral part of our relationship with God. It is all of our communication with Him. But often we get distracted by the more 'interesting', more fun or cooler parts of the relationship. We get caught up with our serving, our activities, our testimony or faith story. We want to make the filling as tasty and attractive as possible. But if the bread, our communication with God and God's word to us and in us, is stale then the whole thing will be bad.

I think it's the same in all relationships. If the communication is off then the whole relationship will be out of kilter. You can't enjoy other aspects of the relationship if you can't or don't communicate well.

If our communication with God is struggling, then it only makes sense that it will have an impact on the whole relationship.

I know that I have a tendency to view prayer as functional and definitely don't have the prayer life I could/should/want to. Its sometimes too easy to miss the importance of prayer and how much of an impact it can have. It should really be the main point.

We need to be in good communication with God. Only He knows the plans He has for us. Only He can direct our feet and light our paths. Only He knows what things we need to encounter.

So, next time you have a sandwich think about your prayer life and whether its as fresh as it could be!

Notes from the allotment:

- weeds can look pretty.

- never judge the strength of a weed by the amount you can see above the ground.

- there's no point removing the weed if you leave the root in...it will just grow back.

- weeds don't stop you producing fruit...but they will reduce the quality and quantity of the fruit.
- some creatures can feed off weeds just as much as they can feed off fruit.

- removing weeds is hard work...especially when they've been left for a long time.

- if I go back to the allotment and it is as overgrown as it was on Monday, I will be very upset!

Phil and I spent a lot of time on Monday at our allotment. I wished we'd taken before and after photos because I removed a whole load of weeds (big, waist high, nasty, prickly, bug filled weeds!) and in some areas it looked quite different when we left. I also got to plant some stuff too...Italian onion (Christmas present from mum), kale and some unidentified, surprise veggies!

While pulling and digging up the weeds I thought a lot about the weeds we can allow to grow in our life. The weeds that will grow and take over if we allow them to. The weeds that will reduce the quality and quantity of our fruit. The weeds that can look or seem innocent but which do a lot of damage deep down.
Dealing with any kind of weed is hard work and is usually an on going process but the result is completely worthwhile.

In our allotment, the aim is to grow fruit and veg that we (and others) can eat and enjoy and that provides energy and sustenance to us.
In my life, I hope to produce fruit that I and others can enjoy. That brings life, energy and sustenance. So it's important that I deal with, and keep on top of the weeds.

14 months...

Ok, so I totally missed the 13 month update. Things were a little crazy around here at the end of May.

Anyway, here are some lovely photos I took yesterday while we were playing in the park.

Being a little naughty and climbing up the slide!

Chasing a friend and squealing with delight! So funny to watch!

I know this one is a little out of focus but I really like it (it looks better if you look at it from further away!)

I can't believe how much his walking is coming on. He doesn't fall very often, which is good for my nerves! And he was loving being so adventurous and climbing on things yesterday. And the slide was good fun too!

His talking is coming on and he tries to copy a lot of what we say. And he's picking up the baby sign very quickly now too, which can be really helpful when we're trying to work out what he's asking for!

And we finally have the next two teeth! Its only taken them about 4 months but they've actually broken through the gum now. Although they're only poking out by about 1mm! So that takes the total tooth count to 6 so far.

And this is the 'mummy, please stop taking photos of me and help me climb on this thing' face!!!